Description

Lou Seal

(With apologies to Kenny Rogers, and to lyricist Joe Turner.)



In a bay near to Scarboro’,

A mile from the harbour,


There lived a family of seals.

Robert, the father,

(Or Bob if you’d rather)

Thrived on a diet of eels.

Now Bob had a missus,

They shared love and kisses


And on Fridays a little bit more.


She could look glamorous

And come over amorous


A little way out from the Scarboro’ shore.



Then one day last May-time,

At the end of the daytime,


She notified Bob with a squeal,

“Guess what - I’m expecting.

You’d best start selecting


A name for our new baby seal.”

Well, Bob went a-diving

With flipper high-five-ing -


He was over the moon was our Bob.


He said to his missus,

“You know what bliss this is


But picking a name’s a responsible job.”



"We picked some fine names for our first two seals;

Picking a third shouldn’t be a great deal.


There’s Constance – our Con Seal,

And Ronald – our Ron Seal;


They both have some kind of appeal -


But what should we call our new seal?”



After some drinking,


Bob set to thinking


And searched all around for a clue.

He liked Louis Armstrong

And that Johnny Cash song -


The one where he called his son Sue.


Should Bob call him Johnny?


With Connie and Ronnie?


At least the three kids’ names would rhyme.


But this wasn’t a game –


And there was just one name


Kept coming back time after time.



“I’ve picked a fine name and called him Lou Seal -


Like Louis Armstrong (Is that too surreal?)


I've had a rough time – a really quite tough time -


But this name has lasting appeal:


I’ve picked a fine name and called him Lou Seal.”



“I’ve picked a fine name and called him Lou Seal”


(He mopped at his brow as he made the reveal.)


“I've had a rough time – a really quite tough time -


But this name has lasting appeal:


I’ve picked a fine name and called him Lou Seal.”



“I’ve picked a fine name and called him Lou Seal.”

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