I talked it all through with our Janet -
In truth it was her idea.
“You’ll have to order by phone,” she said,
“I don’t think they sell them round here.”
A basket of goods on a Christmassy theme
Some cake and preserve and some drink
Some cheeses and biscuits and that kind of thing
“They’ll like that,” she said, “Don’t you think?”
So I rang some directory thingy.
They gave me some numbers to call.
I rang up the first one they gave me,
Didn’t bother to ring round them all.
I’m not all that good on the telephone;
Can’t always make out what they say.
They asked me some questions
About colour and size and what I was hoping to pay.
When they asked me the size that I wanted.
I said, “A metre? A metre and half?”
“That’s a little bit big!” said the salesgirl.
I could tell she was stifling a laugh.
“Well, a smaller one then!” I retorted.
To be honest, I just had to bluff.
She mentioned some fruit and some nuts and some berries
It sounded like Christmassy stuff.
But somewhere in all these arrangements
A misunderstanding arose.
I found it quite difficult to hear what she said
And the same went for her, I suppose.
So if you’re left wondering about the delivery
And supposing it came from a prankster,
I’d better confess, I’m to blame for the mess:-
It’s me you can thank for the hamster!