Anywhere and everywhere

Up against the wall in the alley near the chip-shop

In ‘er garden shed where ‘er dad keeps all ‘is tools

Down behind the bushes at the bottom of the garden

And of course, behind the bike-sheds of a dozen different schools

We’ve done it in the snow and ice, we’ve done it in the rain

Once or twice we’ve done it in the fog

You get to be quite good at it when you’ve done it over again

And we might have time for a little secret snog

We’ve done it nearly everywhere - We’re really not too fussy

To be fair – some people think we’re rather random

But you can’t be too particular (we both of us agree)

It’s not easy when you’ve got to park a tandem.

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